Unraveling the realism of racism is distressing for me. Raised by my parents to respect all people and to thwart racist thinking has been my moral compass and buoyed a belief that we are all drifting down this muddy river together. However, watching the Ferguson events the past months have made me realize how idealism is not realty. This is about racism but it is not about black versus white. It is about a certain class of people who perpetuate the poor-me mentality and glorify the gansta lifestyle. Watching the glee on the faces of the looters disgusts me. They have no self-respect, so they disrespect others. I am sad for those who have made it their lifework to be activists against racism. I am angry at the low life, small minded fools who don’t understand how their behavior continues to spread hatred and disgust. They want equality? Well become a self respecting member of the community. The irony is astounding. My grandsons are asking questions. It is a challenge to respond without planting a seed. The cycle will continue thanks to the behaviors of a certain class of people who thrive on division. As long as they continue to play the race card the game will never end.
Dylan is Double Digits!
At this milestone birthday I want to wish for you a huge birthday wish for many, many, many more happy days in your childhood. You are 10!! Ten seems like you are growing up so fast, but I am here to remind us all that you are STILL a young boy. That is GREAT!!!.
You still have so much more of your childhood left Dylan so enjoy playing with all your friends. Enjoy all the silly goofing off and clowning around that only a child can get away with! Enjoy make-believe and pretending! Enjoy digging in the dirt and exploring. Enjoy your Army men and Minecraft. You have a great life and are surrounded by love which is reflected in the goodness of your heart and the sweetness of your personality.
I will enjoy introducing you to more and more of the world (and books) and answering your inquisitive questions. I am so proud of the capacity of your brain inside that cranium of yours Dylan! Like a sponge it soaks up so much every day, continually learning. Enjoy all that! Never stop observing the world, thinking and asking questions.
Do NOT worry about anything. You are 10! You are bright and smart! You know what your job is! Listening at school. Being polite to others. Looking both ways when crossing roads. Taking care of a few chores at home. Eating healthy and getting exercise every day to keep your body and brain strong and happy.
It is hard for me to express with words… but your first 10 years have spread so much laughter, love and joy to your entire family! When I think of you, it is always brings a smile to my face and it always brings a fierce feeling of pride and protection. I love everything about you Dylan.
Your #1 Fan, Grandma.
Passed out til noon
She swigs Bloody Marys while applying
War paint with an unsteady hand.
Sunken, hungover, puffy eyes
Veiled by Visine.
Barely gets the red out.
But the sparkle is gone for good.
A counterfeit in coiffed curls and fake smirk.
A gussied up clotheshorse in brand name style.
Dressed to the nines to disguise DUI’s.
Living an artificial reality she deceives even herself.
Sipping on Crown, searching out imperfections in others.
Fabricating falsehoods while pretending frivolity.
Stirring up slanderous gossip with her silver spoon.
Tossed back with a shot of ad naseum
She makes Happy Hour an irony.
Donna J. Heatherly
I am always on the lookout for ways to stay healthy. In addition to healthy eating I have added ImmunGuard to my regime. I have been inspired to eat healthier by Dr. Furhman’s speaking on television ( PBS) the past couple of year, and was delighted to discover this AdvoCare product and another reason I am impressed with this company. http://www.drfuhrman.com/library/mushrooms_enhance_immune_function.aspx
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IS THIS YOU?
He is a gatherer of ideas
Expresses them well.
He is an ideal man.
He is open minded
Uncluttered and receptive to the opinion of others.
He is a liberal thinker.
He laughs openly and often.
Shares sharp amusing outlooks on current politics.
He is a humorist.
He is approachable and friendly.
An ally to all lucky to know him
He is a conversationalist.
He is empathic and sincere.
Pained and enraged by global cruelty
He is a humanitarian.
He is loving and loved.
He is my greatest supporter.
He is genuine.
He is my dad.
Donne Jeannine Heatherly (08/07/2014)
Happy 80 years wise my dear dad!
Meramec River Boys – A Sequel to Black River Boys
D. J. Heatherly / July 27, 2014
Happy smiles from a proud grandma greet my grandsons upon their arrival.
I hug them hello feeling tight little arms wrap around my soul.
First things first.
They remove their shoes and run inside to assess the sleeping arrangements.
Well-taught and well-mannered.
They know the rules of the Raptor as instructed by Vernon.
Dylan climbs up the loft with his pillows and his thoughts.
Devin quickly follows.
Together, they stretch out for a total of 3 minutes, planning their next move.
Zip down the ladder, zoom out the door to explore.
An old cedar swingset sits 500 yards away.
We keep them in our sights giving them their space.
Two brothers swing and giggle uninhibited.
I join them.
Fearless, Devin swings willy-nilly in an attempt to hit the swing posts.
I grab a pair of ankles to suspend Dylan in mid swing.
A tangible memory floods my senses.
A palpable push that propels me back in time.
I recall how I swung them as toddlers.
I describe the feel of their tiny backs as I gently pushed, reminding them to hold on tight, and to swing their sweet, skinny legs.
I tell them how much they liked to be swung by Grandma.
Dylan says, “Show me.”
I grab his 9 year old ankles. Stronger now, and capable of hiking, running, tree climbing, pedaling.
I grab a hold and push him back, then, I run behind him, grab the swing to delay momentum, which always made him nervously giggle when he was a tot. He roars with delight.
Love flourishes when laughter abounds.
Devin wants the same, of course, so I repeat the process.
“Again” they say in unison just as they did years ago.
Their legs are now too long for a swingset however who can resist reliving past moments?
Later, after dinner, it’s back to the old swingset again.
Perched in the swing, Dylan is stretched out, laid out parallel to the ground.
“Look at the sky!” he yells with wonderment.
I look up to see a jet black night glittering with silver stars.
At that moment my sweet mom is with me.
I tell the boys my belief that stars are the energy and spirit of good people who have left this earth.
“Yes. I know.” Dylan says. “My grandma Jean is up there. And dad’s dad, Chuck.”
I want to cry. Instead I smile and hug him and Devin tight.
Early morning awakens us. We eagerly prepare for a 6-mile float.
Skin slathered with SPF. Skulls protected with bandanas.
A school bus like none they have ever ridden awaits us.
Loaded with coolers full of beer. And adults full of excitement.
Cracked windows with a solitary spider hanging on for dear life on a web.
Blows into the bus as the bus driver picks up speed careening around a corner.
I scream as Bobby rescues us by closing the window.
Startled by a loud pop, we all jump in our seats!
Dylan’s window has been hit.
Realizing it was a water balloon thrown by a random camper, we all laugh.
Except Dylan is not laughing. He barely manages a smile.
I imagine the many scenarios running through his head. All the questions he has. All the reasons. Why was it his window? All the what-ifs. He is a deep thinker.
Scramble to the raft.
Attach tubes to the raft for the kids, to which Dylan and Devin’s faces say it all before they even speak it.
Scared of snakes striking. Fear of fish biting.
“It’s an adventure” I encourage.
They bravely get in their tubes and we take off!
We move at a snail’s pace.
Dangling legs in the murky Meramec River.
Fear of unknowns’ unseen in the water.
Anxiety overwhelms Dylan.
“We are survivalists!” I tell the boys, as I get in his tube as he takes my place in the raft.
“Ahhh, this feels sooo good.” I smile. And it did, so happy to share this day with them!
In a valiant attempt later, Dylan gets back on a tube.
Trepidation of turtles. Worry about the white water.
“Lift your bottoms up.” His mom and I say together approaching faster moving “rapids” so river rocks would not bump them.
Dylan straightens his entire self out on top of the tube, elongated and nearly hyperventilating with worry.
We laughingly decide it is time to give up the tubes.
Eight people and 2 coolers in a 6-man raft.
The tubes glide empty behind us as we fill up the raft with gaity and contentment.
Our society is comprised of people from an array of cultural and ethnic backgrounds. However, unfortunately, we are far away from being a successful pluralistic society. Although some integration happens spontaneously, a pluralistic society is one that acknowledges, allows and accepts the cultural diversity of its citizens. Multiculturalism is an ideology. The term refers to salad bowl or melting pot. Critics of multiculturalism often debate whether the multicultural ideal of nonthreatening, co-existing cultures that interrelate and influence one another, while remaining separate, is possible, logical or even desirable. It is argued that cultures who would previously have had a distinctive cultural identity of their own, lose out to enforced multiculturalism and that this will ultimately erode the host nations’ distinct culture.
In a political context, the term multiculturalism is used for a wide variety of meanings, ranging from the advocacy of equal respect to the various cultures in a society, to a policy of promoting the maintenance of cultural diversity. The politics of today limit an honest discussion of multiculturalism. Leaders will only express what they think their audience of the hour will want to hear. The heated debate about immigration reform has been ongoing for decades, and yet it continues with no real solution. I disagree with the idea that people do not need to integrate with the society in which they immigrate to. I do not think that you can set up your own little country inside of another, with differing laws and extreme values. Immigration should be examined and laws implemented in order to aid both the immigrants, as well as the host country. I think outreach action from communities to accept immigrants into their neighborhoods is crucial as well, in order to help them become and feel more integrated.
The Census Bureau predicts a shift in the composition of the U.S. population. With an estimated yearly influx of 1 million legal immigrants, there is an equal number of illegal immigrants entering the United States each year. The overwhelming majority of immigrants, both legal and illegal, come from the Third World. Another factor which will radically change the ethnic composition of the population — a factor given less attention by the Census Bureau — is the differential birth rates of the various groups involved. It is quite likely that, given current trends, the European American will find himself in a minority long before 2050. This would suggest that the United States of 2050 will be America Balkanized, an America without Americans, an America in which citizens will identify with their minority status and forget about the nation as a whole. This is due to three of the four major population blocs will constitute visible minorities: European Americans or Whites, African Americans or Blacks, Asian Americans or Yellows, and Hispanic Americans. These four blocs will be relentlessly political, locked in a struggle to determine how the increasingly scarce economic goods and natural resources are to be distributed to each group. Can a nation so wracked by internal struggle long endure? History suggests not.
The September 26, 2011 issue of Newsweek, on page 48, titled “Marry or else!” by Michelle Goldberg, there is a quote by former Associate General Counsel of the United States Immigration and Naturalization Service, James Walsh, who gives the opinion that the Balkanization of America is underway. I wonder, is this just fear-mongering? Walsh states, “Immigrants devoted to their own cultures and religions are not influenced by the secular politically correct facade that dominates academia, news-media, entertainment, education, religious and political thinking today,” He further states, “They claim the right not to assimilate, and the day is coming when the question will be how can the United States regulate the defiantly unassimilated cultures, religions and mores of foreign lands? Such immigrants say their traditions trump the U.S. legal system. Balkanization of the United States has begun.”
In an interesting decade-long study by Harvard professor of political science Robert D. Putnam, showed how multiculturalism affects social trust. He surveyed 26,200 people in 40 American communities, finding that when the data were adjusted for class, income and other factors, the more racially diverse a community is, the greater the loss of trust. People in diverse communities “don’t trust the local mayor, they don’t trust the local paper, they don’t trust other people and they don’t trust institutions,” writes Putnam. In the presence of such ethnic diversity, Putnam maintains that we act like turtles. The effect of diversity is worse than had been imagined. And it’s not just that we don’t trust people who are not similar to us, we distrust those who do not look like us.
I think the humane and moral solution to ease the fears, and thereby aiding in a greater understanding of all peoples on this great earth, has to begin with teaching individuals cognitive and behavioral ethnocultural empathy. This should be done at an early age. Once children understand the physical differences with other groups, they then are able to become aware of the perspectives, experiences and attitudes shared by other ethnic groups, and finally develop the ability to take the perspective of other ethnic groups. Using cultural empathy as a “learned ability” may prove to aid in conveying an accurate understanding and more peaceful interaction between the mosaic peoples of the world. Using cognitive, affective and communicative processes together, perhaps we can probe for deeper insights, find similarities, and help to accept our differences.
Traditionally, empathy is roughly defined as the intellectual ability to take the role or perspective of another person and/or an emotional response to another person with the same emotional display. Increasing research found that people usually hold different levels of empathy toward different individuals based on perceived psychological similarities, such as ethnics and culture. Particularly, people usually feel more empathetic towards individuals who are in the same ethnic/cultural groups as they are than those who are not.
Ethnocultural cultural empathy has been used in many other research areas such as racism, feminism, multiculturalism and ethnic identity, and is sometimes applied in cross-culture and/or cross-ethnics analysis. Degrees of ethnocultural empathy were reported to vary by demographics and societal factors. Previous research indicates that women are more likely to report higher level of ethnocultural empathy than men. Non-White individuals are found to have significantly higher levels of general and specific ethnocultural empathy than their White counterparts.
The doctrine of multiculturalism encourages passivity and limits intellectual discussion, and poisons perception. The mere idea that we believe that cultures should coexist without problem, does not eliminate the problems of coexistence. Blind rhetoric is not a substitute for solution to problems, so a more practical approach that is focused less on kind words and more on the best practical results, is the best. Pragmatism wins when it is at conflict with ideology, and different situations require different practical solutions. In my opinion Social integration and Social Blending is a superior alternative. But, can we create one culture that can embrace new customs?
Donna J. Heatherly
Limerick To My Dad
As a wee lass, there were cuddles, laughter, and kind words when I was crying.
There was naught ever a thing in my life time that I needed.
Alas, the Insolence of youth, rolling of eyes, and sounds of sighing.
His sage advice I seldom heeded.
With age and maturity my own offspring were seeded.
Now it is known to all who have known him…
My dad is the finest, without even trying!
Thank you for your constant care and love!
Donna J. Heatherly
Dad and I Circa 1961. He grew a beard in honor of the E. St. Louis Centennial… the hat I am wearing is his from the event.
His beard was red, and his hair was blonde, I should add!
I am not a musician (beyond playing the violin several years in my very distant past), I have a huge appreciation for all music, and am a self-proclaimed wordsmith with a huge love of the written word. The lyrics on Nomad evoke strong emotions and I am now a huge fan of this young man, which is why I am sharing my review with my readers!
Logan Anderson has it all.
A freshly unique voice, polished and crisp, incredibly talented musically, and also obviously in technical ability. No samples, loops, drum machines, keyboards or any other electronic instruments are used in his music, with the exception of an electronic bass guitar. All the sounds are created by the artist using the most unlikely of instruments.
It is rare that a CD comes out in which each track is melodically entertaining, however I feel the each one on Nomad’s are! I gotta tell you how pleased I am with how the vocals change on most every track, and how each song has a different emotion behind the sounds.
If I had to chose only two words to describe this CD I would use
Here are my favorites….
Free: I relate to the poetic lyrics. I love listening to rain too! And enjoy listening to the melodic vocals in this. I like the message in this song, keep singing and dreaming on.
Impossitively. I am digging the rhythm. That timing/pause thing going on before it goes into the piano/crescendo is so cool! The layering of sounds/music is sophisticated indeed. Makes me dance each time I hear it. And what is that noise, fading into, like a flight of insects or something? So original and I Love It!!
Show and Tell: This puts a tear in my eye and a smile on my face at the SAME TIME! That NEVER happens for me music these days. (Except for when I heard Mumford & Sons for the first time). ‘…dusty village mother showed us around… compassion brightened her emotion sound…. with my brothers I would fight all the time, until we learned without pride life was just fine. Show me your happy. Where the smiles come easy. ‘ The sweet innocence in these lyrics makes me so misty and I can see evidence of the love and laughter you were raised with. Hannah’s beautiful voice harmonizes with you so exceptionally, and I can hear the love in your voices. (Sweets and Honey too). When the guitar softly joins the piano I get goosebumps. Seriously. I will be sharing this song (and CD) with my friends and family. That is what I get from you!
Sunspot and Nomad: Logan’s musical genius is evident with using Sunspot as a prelude to Nomad, both of which are completely different on an emotional level from the other tracks. Oh my gosh, the thunder and that eeriness about it, is full of mystery. Reminiscent of the music of Enigma. Blows my mind! First time I listened I was a little creeped out, but now I envision being greeted to eternity. I hear door knocking, mysteriously angelic-like male voices, a heart beating, then an uplifting rhythm. The mystery behind the uncertainty of eternal life.
A Better Life. ‘My eyes are on the loose. Running around and looking for stories to tell. And they look for you. A circuit board of city lights.’ I love the well crafted metaphors. To the top and to the stars I have no doubt this new artist is heading now. Way up… Way up… way up!
Donna J Heatherly
Imagine how life for millions of people would benefit from a more tolerable, empathetic, open minded society. If I could snap my fingers and change ONE thing on earth what would it be?
The ONE influential area that is the foundation for global unity is in the sphere of education. All children would be shown kindness, taught proper manners and instructed in household chores at home from the earliest age, instilling in them strong morals for empathy and a desire for self-discipline. In primary grades the schools would include mandatory subjects such as Geography, Culture, World History, Science and World Languages, as well as the tried and true Three R’s: Reading, Writing and Arithmetic. As these children matured they would then be challenged with more intellectual topics such as Ethics/Morals, Politics, Theology, Environmental Issues, Psychology, and Social Sciences. I may be dreaming, but by the end of high school these children would have been educated in several languages, and have attained an appreciation of cultures across the globe, gained knowledge of not just the United States government history, but also a clearer understanding of the politics of other countries.
I imagine how better off the world would be without racism of any form; for intolerance of another persons’ religious views and pure evil to come to an end. Think of it! A world of productive citizens living on this beautiful planet, and all of them free of judgments, jealousies, greed and resentment, which in turn ultimately lead to hate. This idealized society of the world would be bound together, working for the greater good of all of mankind and striving to protect our dear, fragile Earth.
Perhaps with this start, all the varied societies around the world would be more open and accepting of each other’s values, both religiously and politically and have a more meaningful, honest and productive communication with one another.
Awards would be given more for competence in the area of academics, as a motivation to produce great thinkers, rather than placing such high importance on sports. Naturally, in this idealized world, the media would concentrate their efforts on highlighting those events such as academic achievement, discoveries in science and successful charities, rather than placing celebrities on a pedestal. Criminals would not receive more than 10 minutes of airtime, just enough to get the word out. I say make public the names and faces of great thinkers, problem solvers and profound artists on the front pages of magazines and newspapers!
Time would be more well spent on working on solutions for world peace, to end global warming, reducing poverty and advancing efforts to cure fatal diseases, rather than dreaming of ways to make more money to pay for homes that are too large only to impress. People would gain respect in society because of his value in the community via volunteer work, raising generations of moral citizens, etc., rather than the kind of car he drives. Less time would be spent sitting in front of the tube watching reality shows. Think of how bored we would be, watching those sorts of inane television programs, if we were a more intellectual humanity. Of course the Arts and sporting events would be enjoyed with great appreciation and pleasure. True artistry and phenoms would be regarded with respect and admiration, held in high esteem, but not too loftily.
Imagine if all the people of the world could garner such an education and realize the true purpose of their short existence on Earth.
Donna J. Heatherly